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Difference Between Women And Men

By Ezday On January 5, 2009 Under Jokes
  1. FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
  2. NAMES If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
  3. EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
  4. MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need, but it’s on sale.
  5. BATHROOMS A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
  6. ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that… is the beginning of a new argument.
  7. CATS Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren’t looking, men kick cats.
  8. MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change! And she does.
  9. DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
  10. NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.